Airlines to Charge Extra for Sitting Beside Sexy Cabin Crew

If you’re flying this summer to the US, be prepared to pay a supplementary fee to grab your seat beside that hot cabin crew of your dreams.

As per the newly unveiled policy by the Americana Airlines, passengers will have an option to choose their seats close to a sexy Air Hostess with an extra charge of 100$, when booking online at the airline’s website.

“This is the kinkiest way of travelling,” senior executive of the airline, Chris McConnell, told The Wadiyan. “So far, it was a privilege accessible only to the elite frequent fliers. Now we want to give everybody a chance.”

In addition, while explaining the policy in detail, Chris McConnell said the airline did not want to offend its loyal frequent fliers. “Our elite frequent fliers will be better rewarded too. They will have the option to sit in the cockpit behind the pilot for five minutes before takeoff,” he said.

airlines to charge extra to sit near sexy cabin crewPhoto © CC-Dragon Air / Flicker

According to travel and tourism experts, airlines are looking for multiple ways to raise revenue to offset rising fuel costs. “In the last few years, they have added fees for checked baggage, watching TV, skipping security lines and boarding early,” says Jerry Slims, a cafeteria owner at the JFK International Airport in New York City. “But this new plan is even more interesting. It makes overnight flying more rewarding.”

Our source in the airline industry indicates that a pay-per-view pornography option might be added to the in-flight entertainment systems by 2014 in most flights.

On a similar note, a recent research by Bharat Singh, an associate professor in Some University in Norway, urged airline companies to implement innovative plans to monetize on the economy class travel experience.

The study suggests implementing a Pay-As-You-Poop pricing for toilet usage on flights, where an electronic system will quantify the amount of dump released by individual passengers and will be charged on their credit card accordingly. Singh argues that as the onboard toilet facility is an expensive luxury, defecating passengers should pay more for their travel.

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Writer and Creative Designer

4 Comments

  1. kiwiinphils says:

    Excellent! I note also that Niue Island has introduced a new fare structure whereby the passenger is weighed in at the check-in counter and charged accordingly; Taking into account Pay-as-you-Poop policy it may become necessary to do a reconciliation of passenger weight at the end of flight and credit any nett weight loss to a passenger’s credit card.

  2. kiwiinphils says:

    Airlines should further consider the option of “Waste-dump-whilst-flying” to further reduce fuel costs; On international routes such as over North Korea it could be useful to schedule a waste dump over Pyongyang